at a certain point, it is no longer about adding things to your life – but taking them away.
fast? easy? simple steps?
how about this.
un-fuck your head.
a good read is “good calories, bad calories” from gary taube. you don’t need sugar. you probably don’t need pasta or bread either. you sure as shit don’t need soda (even sugar free or diet) or to drink calories in any way. eat green vegetables. lots of them. using vegetables as your carbohydrate source will more or less guarantee that you do not overeat (assuming you are sticking to the thirds rule). also if you don’t read the label before you eat it you are again clinging to inexcusable, willful ignorance. my friend from the above story chose low GI as yardstick. find yours.
replace your addiction – and mind your budget.
find something. anything. something that you can use to burn off excess emotions, something to justify your discomfort. combat sport makes this clear – “i am going to resist cake today… and someone is going to pay for it” – we joke about it all the time, transferring our frustrations, taking it out on others. our minds are good at that sort of redirection – it fits our story. use that. resistance without reward has its cost – know what you can spend and work smart. know how to build equity. manage consequences – with a drug addict smoking weed instead of shooting heroin is a step in the right direction. take the edge off – but remain just uncomfortable enough. we grow to fit our surroundings, manage those and you will be alright.
be honest – you know how you are going to fail. you have done this before, probably more than once. what were the mechanisms of your failure? the circumstances? why didn’t you have a plan to deal with that? come home late and hungry? leave a go-to meal in the freezer. ready to crack if you don’t go out? check 4 or 5 local restaurants, sit with their menus and plan out a good meal or two at each. stick it to your fridge – these are now the carryout options. they are not problems if you have a plan to deal with them. honestly assess your shortcomings – they will only be an issue if you allow them to be.
manage your expectations.
the goal here is to change – with that in mind the only way to fail is to die or to give up. anything shy of that just changes the timeline. it is hard – to change what you believe – it will take time, but not working at it wont make it happen any faster. tricks like these are part substitute, and part process – changing how you see yourself, how you see your place in the world – that is the goal here. i have met many people who tell me that they can stick to a change for about 6 weeks and then they give up – they want to know what i can do for them… i don’t even know where to start. if you know the problem why don’t you fix it? if you have already organized an exit strategy, orchestrated your failure – isn’t there a more productive way you can spend the next 6 weeks? again, this is about a story – the only story that matters. you are the hero here – to grow, you need to fight. you need drama. but you also need to survive. there are a lot of things we cannot control in this world, so cling hard to the things you can. too big of a bite causing you to choke? take smaller fucking bites and keep moving. small victories can build momentum – use that.
it is time to start telling yourself a different story.